By
Lacey Conner, SHRM-CP
on
Jul
13,
2020
4 min read
0 comment(s)
Everyone will suffer the loss of a loved one at some point. In fact, the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) estimates roughly 3 million people die in the U.S. each year. If you think about the number of survivors impacted by the death of just one person, it becomes clear millions of people could be grieving at any given time and many of those have jobs. Inevitably, the individual’s pain, denial and anger will spill into the workplace, and possibly even more so today. With many people adhering to social distancing guidelines, it can be more difficult for impacted individuals to lean on their support systems. It will be up to your organization’s leaders to create an environment that supports grieving team members and helps them transition back to their “normal” work life.
The grieving process isn’t universal; everyone handles it differently. While five stages have generally been accepted — denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance — there is no single timetable to guide employers who are trying to support a grieving employee. Signs an employee is struggling with grief include (but are not limited to) fatigue, low morale, inability to concentrate, diminished work quality, absenteeism, anger, irritability, symptoms of depression and lack of motivation. These telltale signs of grief may indicate your employee is in need of additional support.
One of the most uncomfortable situations a manager or supervisor finds themselves in is supporting an employee who has just lost a loved one. It often seems nothing that is said or done can help take the pain away. The situation is very delicate for employers and involves balancing compassion and understanding with maintaining workplace productivity. That said, it is important for leaders to know their interactions with grieving employees play a critical role in their healing process, and returning to work and resuming normal routines is a big part of recovery. Here are four ways managers and supervisors can support a grieving employee:
When it comes to bereavement leave, time off is generally given for the purpose of making funeral arrangements and/or attending the funeral/memorial services and provides the opportunity for the employee to grieve privately. The amount of time off is often based on the relationship to the deceased — the death of immediate family members generally results in more days off than the death of extended family members. Many organizations offer 3-5 days off and it is typically paid.
Remember, a loss can be highly personal and while some people within the organization will need to know, the employee’s privacy should also be respected. Therefore, when it comes to communicating with the team, the bereaved employee should always be asked what amount of information they are comfortable with others knowing. In some cases, they are an open book, in others, they won’t want anyone to know. Both are okay and it is your job, as a manager, to respect their wishes.
It is important to continue to support the bereaved employee when they return back to the workplace. Oftentimes, those first few days back in the office are the hardest. While employers should expect productivity, they should also understand it may not be where it was before the loss. Providing flexibility in workloads or due dates is best practice, along with granting remote work days.
Poor grooming habits, social withdrawal and substance abuse may indicate the employee is suffering from prolonged grief. As an employer, you are in the position to observe changes in the grieving employee’s behavior and recommend support through an Employee Assistance Program (EAP). EAPs help employees with a variety of issues including mental health services.
Supporting a grieving employee with empathy and care strengthens trust, loyalty, and emotional well-being. Even simple gestures and understanding policies can make a profound difference during a difficult time. As a leader, your thoughtful response not only helps the individual heal but also reinforces a compassionate workplace culture.
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